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Take a deep breath, readers. The Dougie-dancing, bikini-modeling, heartbeat-quickening Kate Upton has a birthday today — and she’s only turning 20. That’s right. Though it’s hard to remember life before her entry into the public eye, the model was, until today, a teenager.
How would you celebrate such a momentous occasion for such a momentous girl? That’s where we come in. Here’s how to throw the perfect birthday party for your significant other — at any age.
She’s Turning 20-Something
All women are different, but there are often common threads that link a particular age group. In the case of a 20-something, the common denominator is an almost universal desire to get drunk and have a good time.
Plan the party: First, take her to a sit-down restaurant. It doesn’t have to be fancy, but, if she and you are like any 20-somethings we know, sit-down meals don’t happen often. She’ll appreciate it.
Then, corral as many of her friends and acquaintances as you can, cram them into your dorm room/apartment, provide a few cases of beer and invent a new cocktail, create a fun playlist and lure her into her makeshift surprise party. If she and her friends are teetotalers, whip out a blender and prepare nonalcoholic fruity drinks.
She’s Turning 30-Something
You’re not tied down with kids yet or you’re young-ish parents who still yearn for the fun times of the recent past. Her birthday is when you put your newly acquired disposable income to good use.
Plan the party: Go for a cocktail, then take her and a handful of her closest friends out to dinner at a buzzed-about restaurant she’s always wanted to try. Indulge in Champagne and don’t be stingy with the wine. If you can afford it, pay for everyone’s meal.
She’s Turning 40-Something
You’re both probably pretty domesticated by now. Plus, expensive dinners out aren’t that much of a rarity now that you both have established careers. You’re going to have to put some effort into this one. You’re going to have to cook.
Plan the party: Minimize distractions. If you have kids around, get a babysitter or send them to a friend’s house. You have to plan a menu, clean up and set an impressive-looking table. This may be daunting, but it’s doable, and she’ll really appreciate it. If all else fails, make sure you have good alcohol around, laugh it off and order the best takeout in your ‘hood. Invite four or five other people over for a warm, intimate celebration.
She’s Turning 50-Something
She’ll probably say she doesn’t care about her birthday and insist that you really don’t have to do anything. You have to do something. No matter what she says, everyone likes to feel special.
Plan the party: This should be a family affair — just you, her and maybe your grown children. Reserve a table at the nicest restaurant in your city and book tickets to some kind of show afterward.
The Timeless Essentials
What you really have to try to do, no matter her age, is make her birthday fun. Don’t worry about impressing her friends (fancy doesn’t always equal fun). Just make sure you’ve got all the basics — food, alcohol, etc. — in ready supply. Good times will ensue.
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